Taking Off The Mask 2016:

Taking off the mask 2016:

Do you know what it's like to have people ask; so what do you do? And fumble with a response because people do indeed, even your friends, judge you a bit--even if they won't admit or maybe don't even realize, by how you answer. I do.

Some days, I beam with pride because I look at the clock and it is 4 pm and the dishes are done, the litter has been done and taken down the three flights twice and my bed is made. The place is picked up and I've puttered around doing little things, probably at most remained seated for not even a full 30 minute TV show doing so. I may still be un-showered and doing that by 5/6 pm leaves me feeling super accomplished: showered, all neat and clean and now I can relax--relax from what? People DO ask. Managing. I managed today!

People can and do, without probably realizing, minimize that accomplishment to a state of embarrassment for me. I then cry most often realizing, myself, what a sad pathetic thing I actually, to the word around me, have done today. Sad by, wow, what a waste. Hearing how others do twice that with a 40 hour a week job and kids and no partner to help.
Hearing how what do you mean you stopped ushering at the RBTL, you loved it and it IS a sweet gig (it is). Hearing how leaving all these things was foolish but to maintain my sanity and my peace it is not. Should I keep burning hot and fast to burn out and get all psycho bitch state when then there is no one but me left around to deal with that? NO, I say. NO.

My Spiritual life is first and foremost to me and for me, everything else is secondary...

I do what I can and yes, overdo it still at times, I am deeply Spiritual and that has become my 12 step to a lot of things; balance, structure, sanity, sobriety (not a drop since 08/31/13), education, family, fellowship and gives me the strength and support I need to get out there and not only manage but share.

What I do day to day, especially at church helps me more than anyone can comprehend--I can say that confidently because, even me, living with my Bipolar1, PTSD, ADHD & GAD--Do not comprehend it, however, I try!

Thanks be to God for all the ways He has gifted me, and yes, my "issues" are gifts, a lot of years of therapy has shown me how so!!

Here's to managing today, plus 1 load of laundry and Thursday Noon fellowship!!!

Get Over Ourselves

It is as if He (THE Prince of Peace) takes a back burner, when really we need to stress more and more the power of faith, hope, love and prayer in lieu of frustration, negativity and fear. 

What I see with my own life is that prayer works better than anything I can try to gain control of--especially when reality often is-it is out of my control.

What I can do is MY part peacefully, hopefully and faithfully. And when overwhelmed by the vile seeds being tossed for planting in this place, turn to those of loving nature, turn within, turn away from those who are temporarily lost.

If we are to be one fairly positive functioning unit we must set ego aside. Just as charity begins at home, (you aren't much good to others if you aren't tending home), so is working for the "Common Good" of all. 

*Regardless of religious denomination and or affiliation, individually we have what it takes for peace on earth, even in storms, when we unmask ourselves to ourselves!

insurance (ɪnˈʃʊərəns; -ˈʃɔː-)
n
1. (Insurance)
a. the act, system, or business of providing financial protection for property, life, health, etc, against specified contingencies, such as death, loss, or damage, and involving payment of regular premiums in return for a policy guaranteeing such protection
b. the state of having such protection
c. Also called: insurance policy the policy providing such protection
d. the pecuniary amount of such protection
e. the premium payable in return for such protection
f. (as modifier): insurance agent; insurance broker; insurance company.
2. a means of protecting or safeguarding against risk or injury.

**This is an internet photo, I do not own this photo.