What a true blessing, as a usual, but as I awaited the bus
sitting on the steps of the adjacent church such wonderful conversations and
interactions, with folks.
I very well could've waited on my own porch however, I love
sitting here and the music from an across the street church was already in full swing and can be heard almost all day Sunday from my humble dwelling.
Today as I sat making chit-chat with everyone going in and
out, greeting those who attend this particular church while I am killing time, being pleasantly invited to not only sit here, on these close to the bus shelter steps, whenever but stop by
whenever--
I realized there was a time when even going into a church was so
uncomfortable, or the thought not really scared me but freaked me out because I
knew I was not 'church bred'. I didn't grow up having church as a part of my life. I often
would think no, I can hold it while walking around rather than even stop at a church
office to ask if I could go to the bathroom because I
didn't feel I'd know how to properly ask.
I see now that I feel much more comfortable. A humble comfortable, bigger yet, I have found
my own "Christ" alive and well that even if not "proper
thoroughbred" religiously or denominationally ("Denominational DNA" quote). I am properly 'bread' in Him... universally!
To the Bay was where I was headed to "worship."
I should say, that I am a member of a church currently and I am struggling. I am mentally ill and that is not talked about. I also am learning that much of what I have spent time in therapy learning of myself is; stop, figure out what I feel and why and then proceed with calm conversation is being repressed to regressing...unfortunately, seems no one talks 'real ' freely in the church, is what I am feeling.
The bad: risk of undoing what I have worked hard on.
The good: sermons and worship and church are everywhere I am!
