Never Ceasing

Love and Live It

Everyday

It may 'tone down'

Periodically

However

Never  ceasing...

Relax--Recoup, Retool, Regroup

You wake me,

won't go away,

until

you get your way.

Grumble-some

my feet hit the floor,

same as days before;

As I caffinate

and vittle-fill your dish,

you, now fast asleep

where I once

comfortably slept! 

:)

#selfishtwit

Thanksgiving

As Thanksgiving approaches, I often find myself in a more contemplative state of mindfulness.  

Much of my own Thanksgiving is the shared by others; blessings, changes, grateful fors, new founds, etc. of which they celebrate and embrace.  It is most refreshing to see and hear others testimonials as well as accomplishments.  In addition to how others live Thanksgiving.  

I continue to look forward to all of yours in addition to those whose paths cross mine day to day...

I am Thankful.

The philosophical Tyger LOL

We all have "stuff" sometimes "tough stuff" enter our lives.

I find when I draw my attention to all else in my life and jaw not about the "tough stuff" & focus on the here and now, wherever I may be that is literally here and now...I'm in peace. I feel God along side in everything, allowing me to stay 'out of the way' as the good blessings unravel the "tough" the way only Christ can...

THE moment I am in is THE moment I am supposed to be in--over and over and over. Stay present. Stay open. Stay aware of blessings when trials arise...
Stay above yet not oblivious!

Random Thoughts

Random thoughts brought on by TV!!

Okay some mom petitions Toys R Us over Breaking Bad action figures.  Seems another example of limited freedoms, it worked.  
If YOU don't like something don't buy it nor allow it in YOUR home...

Sex.  I don't get, never have to be very honest, why that is a pursuit to happiness or unhappiness.  Folks seem very promiscuous even married folks--why?  I am not virginal by any means or shooting for hypocritical. For self, I no longer require or desire that, I was always honest; not the be all end all nor make or break.  Not "normal" for even back in the day--perhaps why 2 outta 3 were not monogamous?  There is so much more, worthy more than to put all stock in the laid basket. 
Oneness and love are not bound by physical acts.  Both can be shared and achieved many, many ways--worth far more than a single act of short term fornication.  The main difference seems simple--Divine vs. Earthly...
So much time it seems people focus on partner, sex, etc.  Perhaps it appears hypocritical being I found part of this at 15 and live what feels so much more happily and free since I recognized this at 29. 

Which brings me to marriage.  Why do some folks take that huge step, only to then mistreat and run around on their spouse?  Why not just leave?  Why marry at all?  Is it now more of a "got ya locked" as opposed to a sacred promise to love, honor, encourage--want only the best for and of one another in all aspects?  It seems this area has always baffled me..seems more lock in vs. freedom. 

Sometimes I just feel so before and beyond these times,
all at the same time...

TMI

I remember when I was just a cub, maybe 4, not in kindergarden yet and my sister was quite an infant.  I used to get scolded because I would wash her hair with bar soap while she was in her little infant tub in the the big tub.  Though I also remember vividly, a few days prior to the Blizzard of '77, seeing my mother in the hospital.  She was in her pink robe from home and I met my sister.  I remember to this day being very upset she was coming home with us!  Now estranged, we were always very close--we had to be.

It was also this age I had a Mickey Mouse watch.  It had a red face, yellow band and Mickey's little feet would move as a second hand.  I spent much time lying on a braided rug in our living room just watching his feet move.  I especially did so when my parents would fight.  I must have still been left handed because my watch, until late elementary school was always on my right hand.  It was when a teacher pointed out if you are right handed (family 'fixed') your watch goes on the left.

At those times watching Mickey's feet I would sometimes go to the phone and dial the operator.  That is when there were operators to 'talk to' and boy did I!  I did get in some trouble when they would call back and my parents would know I called.  Who knows what I was saying but I sure know I wasn't supposed to.  I chuckle now.  My mother always telling us, me especially; "your mouth runs faster than a whippoorwills ass."  My sister and I never knew what the hell she was talking about or even what that meant.  But we used to mock it often.  Also getting scolded for "laughing like a hyena."  We were convinced and I still am, the woman hates happiness and laughter.

I have been told over many years by various Aunts and Uncles about how before my bath I would line my dolls up and say, with stern finger; "and don't you shit your pants."  My sister had a stuffed monkey she carted around at about age 3/4 she called Little Bastard.  It was his name!!  She would get hollered at for saying it.  We later in life laughed our asses off over the irony--calling us little bastards really says you don't know who our daddy's are!  Though no jest we have always wondered if we are half sisters...regardless I would be pissed if she had a good dad!!  You have to have a sense of humor when well just when...

There were so many times at a young age I would try or want to run away.  It was all I could do to learn to soothe myself when needed.  I had imaginary parents not friends, parents.  I would rub my own hair, and talk nice to me.  I became attached to my stuffed animals and really believed they had feelings.  I never wanted to leave one out.  I find sometimes I will see a stuffed toy on the street and almost feel bad for it, like it feels lost and abandoned, yet knowing it does not it is incapable of such.  It is a childhood throwback for if just seconds.

I must be feeling nostalgic.  I suppose this is enough TMI for this day.

Remember if not one thing--you are never alone.  At least that is what I have been told more times than can be counted by various people in and out of life when I was very alone.  You may not be able to believe it initially but when you are feeling nostalgic later you will see!  Grace and Peace.

A Sheep's Rule of Thumb

It's not about WHAT you do...

"But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret.  And your Father who sees in secret will reward you."
Mathew 6:3-4

"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ."
Philippians 4:7

1 SOLID YEAR SOBER!

08/31/13 Last drink drunk.

T.G.I.F.

Lasting Happiness

The real reason why we sometimes experience a lack of real, deep lasting happiness in our lives is dependency. We are taught to make our happiness dependent on some event, condition, person, object etc. This is why we keep delaying our happiness until things are just right in our life. We think we will be happy in the future and then wonder why we are not happy now. But life is never just right, and the future never comes – there is only now! And that's why, in order to be happy we must make our happiness a decision and not a dependency. This may seem slightly difficult in the beginning, because we have just spent our life being dependent on acquiring something or someone, or seeing the result we desired, or wanting some pain to go away, before we allow ourselves to be happy-- www.thoughtfortoday.org.uk

Exactly right--
RE: www.thoughtfortoday.org.uk

For myself, it was around 2005 this concept actually set in and made sense.  I spent sooooo much time in my late teens & complete twenties 'not wanting to be alone' (that meant unhappy) therefore, falling into the dependancy trap.  Whether it be relationships, things and or a bottle. 

Real happiness is not found via others, acquisitions or self medication...

T.G.I.F. Amen!

Living it!

"And I set before the sons of the house of the Rechabites pots full or wine, and cups, and I said unto them, Drink ye wine.
But they said, We will drink no wine:  for Jonadab the son of Rechab our father comanded us, saying, Ye shall drink no wine, neither ye, nor your sons forever:
Neither shall ye build a house, nor sow seed, nor plant vineyard, nor have any: but all your days ye shall dwell in tents: that ye may live many days in the land where ye be strangers."
Jeremiah 35:5-7.  Amen.

Sober almost a year now.
Cig-free 5 months now.
Caffine free several days now...

Still eating clean,
working out,
down in fat (not fluff-free hee hee)
up in muscle and endurance.

Physically healthy,
mentally sound,

Spiritually heightened and enlightened...

Transforming and growing every day;
Thanks be to God for it all!

41 and living it ♡♥♡

TBT...

The word of the Lord came to me:  Mortal prophecy against the shepards of Israel: prophecy and say to them--the shepards:  Thus says the Lord God:  Ah you shepards of Israel who have been feeding yourselves!
You eat the fat, you clothe yourselves with the wool, you slaughter the fatlings; but you do not feed the sheep.

Ezekiel 34:1-3

*  There have actually been words heard such as thankfulness for not being a sheep but rather a shepard.  I tell you I'd rather be a sheep for God is our Shepard...

Thus says the Lord God, I am against the shepards; and I will demand my sheep at their hand, and put a stop to their feeding the sheep; no longer will the shepards feed themselves.
I will rescue my sheep from their mouths, so that they may not be food for them.

Ezekiel 34:10

But what as it is written,
"What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the human heart conceived,  what God has prepared for those who love him"--

1 Corinthians 2:9

And we speak of these things in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the spirit, interpreting spiritual things to those who are spiritual.

1 Corinthians 2:13

Love does no wrong to a neighbor;  therefore, love is the fulfilling of the law.

Romans 13:8

*  I bear true witness as a sheep of my Lord God...
GOD guides, provides and protects.  The best most intimate relationship one will ever have!

Hebrew Text

The mountains do not witness to him,
nor do the hills proclaim;
The trees have cherished my words
and the flocks
my works.

For who can proclaim
and who
can bespeak
and who can recount the deeds of the Lord?

Everything has God seen,
everything
has he heard and heeded.

He sent his prophet to anoint me,
Samuel to make me great;
My brothers went out to meet him,
handsome of figure and appearance.

Though they were tall of stature
and handsome by their hair,
the Lord God
chose them not.

But he sent and took me from behind the flock
and anointed me
with holy oil.

And made me leader of his people
and ruler over the people of his covenant.

Simply beautiful!  Psalm 151

Psalm 151

"I was small among my brothers,
and the youngest in my father's house;
I tended my father's sheep.

My hands made a harp;
and my fingers fashioned a lyre.

And who will tell the Lord?
The Lord himself;
it is he who hears.

It was he who sent his messanger
and took me from my father's sheep,
and anointed me with his anointing oil.

My brothers were handsome
and tall,
but the Lord was not pleased with them.

I went out to meet the Philistine,
and he cursed me by his idols.

But I drew his own sword;
I beheaded him,
and took away disgrace from the people
of Israel.

Psalm 151: 1-7

Sunday Shenanigans

Every once in a while I play along with others answering some silly questions to see; what animal you should be or what Brady are you--

"Marcia, Marcia, Marcia."  Lol, talk about dated!

I actually think I recieved and gave my first high-five today and had the audacity to say (in jest); "isn't that a bit dated!?"  I digress...

What Color is Your Aura?

I got pink.

These are indeed words I would use to describe myself.  Especially the balance between Spiritual and material [being] existence.

A 'tap on the shoulder' earlier, so to speak, provides the most accurate wording for help in maintaining that balance; "You are not here for you.  You are here for Me." 

For our real treasures are not to be found here on earth...

TGIF

"One day spent in your house, this beautiful place of worship, beats thousands spent on Greek island beaches.

I'd rather scrub floors in the house of my God than be honored as a guest in the palace of sin.

All sunshine and sovereign is Yahweh, generous in gifts and glory.
He doesn't scrimp with his traveling companions.

It's smooth sailing all the way with Yahweh of the Angel Armies." 

Psalm 84: 10-12
[from,The Message]

I bear true witness, Amen.

Above All

"But where shall wisdom be found?

And where

is the place of understanding?

Mortals do not know the way to it,

and

it is not found

in the land of the living..."

Job 28: 12-13

"Let me hear what God the Lord will speak,

for he will speak peace to his people,

to his faithful,

to those who turn to him

in their hearts..."

Psalm 85: 8

"Steadfast love and faithfulness will meet;

righteousness and peace will kiss each other.

Faithfulness will spring up from the ground,
and

righteousness will look down from the sky..."

Psalm 85: 10-11

Hold fast to the laws of the Lord and take refuge in the Word...

Much Relief

Walk it off, suck it up,
let not one thing touch you.
Weight of the world resting heavily upon you.
Hard-core prick
the bag used to carry it all in...

Learned quick and young
never let your guard down--
even if it hurts like hell.

Labeled this
fish out of water

labeled that
flopping about for air

cause you know me like that
gasping.

Released
free
Holy helper, friend, hand
open seas, skies and mind.

Searched and groped for God
found Him;

Rebirth pangs
all in perspective
sigh of much relief
breathing again...

Just enjoy things;

"Do not be conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern
what is the will of God-

what is good and acceptable and perfect"  Romans 12:2

TGIF

I will sing to my God a new song:
O Lord, you are great and glorious, wonderful in strength, invincible.
Let all your creatures serve you, for you spoke and they were made.
You sent forth your spirit, and it formed them;
there is none that can resist your voice.

Judith 16:13-14

Live It.

"It's not about how long you live it's about how you live it."  -MLK

You don't have to preach and quote and be a Biblical scholar.  Gums can flap, often, like nobody's business!  God's Word is written not only in text, but also upon all our hearts. 

The easiest and most wonderful discipleship--Just live it. 

Live it.

Amen.

Live it!

he taught me and said to me,
"Let your heart hold fast to my words;
keep my commandments, and live."  Proverbs 4:4

You blind Pharisee!  First clean the inside of the cup and the plate, that the outside may also be clean.  Matthew 23:26

"'Man's interior is purified only as he refrains from evils, in accordance with the commandments of the Decalogue.'

'When man's interior is purified from evils by his refraining from them and shunning them because they are sins, the internal which is above it, and which is called the spiritual internal, is opened.'

'When the spiritual internal is opened, and through it communication with heaven and conjunction with the Lord are granted, enlightenment takes place with man.'"
-Taken from, Spiritual Life and the Word of God, Emanuel Swedenborg


I AM

I am God's beloved creation.
I am perfectly imperfect.
I am always a work in process & progress.
I am being saved by Christ Jesus repeatedly day to day.
I am changing, growing & transforming in spirit, mind & body,
both seen and unseen, by the divine power of the Holy Spirit; God's will for me being done on earth as it is in heaven.

Today I pray unselfishly to be better today than yesterday as well as closer to Thee & Thy plans for me.
Amen.


Hymn for the day

Though not an Eagle in pic, it is a Hawk.
(Tomato, potato, lol)

In my head, hymn for the day:
ON EAGLE'S WINGS

by Michael Joncas

1. You who dwell in the shelter of the Lord, who abide in his shadow for life, say to the Lord: "My refuge, my rock in whom I trust!"

REFRAIN: And he will raise you up on eagle's wings, bear you on the breath of dawn, make you to shine like the sun, and hold you in the palm of his hand.

2. The snare of the fowler will never capture you, and famine will bring you no fear: under his wings your refuge, his faithfulness your shield. (REFRAIN)

3. For to his angels he's given a command to guard you in all of your ways; upon their hands they will bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone. (REFRAIN)

*w/out major back story-- I am one of many, many individuals who baffle the minds of well respected medical professionals!!!

Thank you, Lord!  Amen.



Sunday Blessed Sunday...

"Blessed are you, O God, with every pure blessing;
let all your chosen ones bless you. 
Let them bless you forever.
Blessed are you because you have made me glad.
It has not turned out as I expected,
but you have dealt with us according to your great mercy."

Tobit 8:15-16

TKO

Head first on the mat
body right behind
total knock-out.

Ding.  Ding.

White stars circling overhead
best attempt, shake it off
all cartoonish.

Look around
same time and space,
further inspection,
different space and time.

Second guessing
right and left
flipping scripts
must rationalize...

Crushing
always aware
searching, though--

Knew one-hundred percent
wanting to need
exactly what you are experiencing.

"A time for every matter under heaven"

TBT part Two--

I've always been a dork.  Just a good old fashioned dork.  However, now I look back to times I'm not real proud of and wonder how did I not understand living a life in Christ doesn't mean;
square, dull, boring, lame, no fun, etc.

The last 18 months alone I've gained knowledge and understanding of growth and change.  New life in Christ has given me back my REAL God given identity.  Oh, I am still a dork, lol, I am less burdened by stress, anxiety, trials, tribulations, society, etc.  My life is far from perfect but one thing I can say with certainty; I really have no complaints.

God provides and guides.  Transforms and enlightens.  Far from boring--I have no need for alcohol, nicotine or drugs.  Just living, growing and loving the way God has planned for me!

Thanks be to God for everything =0)

TBT!

"Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death?  Therefore we have been buried with him by baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life."
Romans 6:3-4

"But now we are discharged from the law, dead to that which held us captive, so that we are slaves not under the old written code but in the new life of the Spirit."
Romans 7:6

"To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace."
Romans 8:6

"So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new!"
2 Corinthians 5:17

AMEN!


In Jesus Christ, we are forgiven

"Therefore just as one man's trespass led to condemnation for all, so one man's act of righteousness leads to justification and life for all."

Romans 5:18

Spot on;

Very spot on;  "ego is capable of destroying your ability to feel love altogether." 

I, myself, relate all too well to this truth.  I also relate to once you realise, however this realisation comes to you--instantaneously, like a volcanic eruption, is the awakening of the heart!

Barriers To Love
Via:  www.thoughtfortoday.org.uk

Whatever is in your heart that is not clean, not true, will ultimately begin to act like a wall, obstructing the natural flow of love. People who say that there is no love in their life, are being blocked by this wall. Actually there is love, but they just can’t accept it. Ego is the clearest example of this. Ego limits the flow of love by placing conditions on the love you give and receive. Ego uses love to satisfy its own needs and desires. It produces a love which is deceptive, one which brings only temporary satisfaction. Ego does not allow you to experience true love or share it. If fact, ego is capable of destroying your ability to feel love altogether.

Psalm 46: 10

Be still and know that I am God!

Happy Monday

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight.  In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."  ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

Relax

Relax, God's got you!

Let Go.

Comfortably "living" obliviously
Kick
Shove
Repress

Uncomfortable attempting to sweep me off my feet,
scared to death.

Listen, look, dig deep
the Holy Spirit leading
gonna hurt a bit, it's okay.
Rather debate, retreat, remain blind to thee.

Not an option this time, sweetie...

Unbeknownst to me, hadn't turned it all over,
baggage, lethal habits
still trying to control-freak subconsciously.  

Goodness and commitment waiting on you,
coming into God's image,
new life in Christ-
I've let go...

I AM His, trust this...

Seek--It's That Simple.

My mind is always racing, no longer in a chaotic can't keep up and keeping me up sense.  Rather, a constant lovely and refreshing sense.

Between the amazing Spirit moving sermons, day to day random human interactions; both w/ those unknown & known to me, the varied varieties of deep, spiritual thirst quenching opportunities also at church--brings forth individual as well as shared Godly relations and growing. 

Even in my required isolate downtime the above maintain not suffocate. 

They race comfortably now, from mind to feet; relaxing, restoring, exploring.  Proper displacement; Jesus working noticeably on the openings and closings!

Living, Loving, Believing

God & I talk often, all day, every day.

Jesus and I walk often, all day, every

day.

Not just in times of trouble and

saddened tears

Also sharing belly laughs and the

happiest tears!

May the Spirit unfold nothing but

God's will for you, Happy New Day!

Excluded.

http://m.13wham.com/article?id=4634956&categoryid=1096&election=&provider=  (controversy over opening meetings with prayer)
Personally, this small step is a victory, I am not a Greece resident.

When I was in sixth grade, some thirty years ago, one morning during the beginning of the Pledge of Allegiance "the new kid" (whose name I still recall) said he couldn't say it.

I grew up in the 'farm country' of New York, where you said the Pledge and we also learned Darwinism along with Creationism.

Needless to say, all eyes on the boy as the teacher asked politely why not.  He was Canadian was his answer as well as in more laymen terms, it would go against his allegiance to Canada.  He was excluded from having to do so and allowed to sit down.

None of us ever thought negatively, more respect for his loyalty.  Later on we learned much about Canada, including the national anthem, which we gladly added to our morning routine at some point.

No lawyers, lawsuits, anger or disrespect, that I recall.  Just proving things can always be worked out.

I myself am mindful to approach things positively, maybe an eye brow raised time to time, though always willing to listen and work.  

I am curious why there's no HUGE deal about "In God We Trust" on our money.  All people use it, jus' sayin' -- things that make you go hmmmm

How Great Thou Art (Throw Back)

For any who disbelieve,
the Lord God does indeed walk with me.

I see Thee
I hear Thee
I feel Thee

and

Thou doth know me inside and out.
On any given day Thou shows Thy face
in many deeds, words and others,
divinely.

Mysterious as it may be,
I KNOW it is Thee,
as I humbly acknowledge
Your presence day to day,
I joyfully give you thanks and praise!

How Great Thou Art...

Time To Wake Up; Soberly Sobering

Have you ever had one of those moments in time when your knees buckled?
Almost as if one of your chums came up from behind and pushed theirs into yours?

Have you ever had one of those moments when you felt time stop?

Your ears went flush, all went quiet for a moment and you realise what you just felt, felt like shock?

A jolt of everything electrically slamming into place,

as if just at the right place and time

everything Divinely aligned?

Your deepest of everything known and unknown colliding from worlds beyond--

YET, fully knowing what is going on quicker than you?

Seeing it

Living it

Infinitely multiplied by powers beyond belief. 

Know what you already possess is of great depths

through our Maker, Creator, Comforter and King...

The powers that be can

stand

tower

and do much on their own

but, combined, when these two worlds collide--

You have the most heaven sent

fully blessed

through Him

and yet to come-- beauty you own

complemented and complementing what is,

what will be

a limitless eternity--

The way God means us to be...

Again, My Rose Colored Glasses, pls

Rochester, NY area colleges to see a 3.5% tuition increase and 4.4% for room and board.

Solution:
"The initiative will offer inmates the opportunity to earn either an associate’s or a bachelor’s degree over the course of two to three years."

Sorry?!  Couldn't resist as the Sesame Street 'which one of these things doesn't belong here...' song runs amuck in my mind!

Side note:  In 2007 one pair of glasses I owned were gold frames with, yes, rose colored lenses!  Got so much wear during the presidential debates they broke in 2009!!!  Lol

Inwardly Turning

One of the reasons Advent is my preference to Lent is the consuming joy felt.
Lent being more a cumbersome, somber state of affairs.

Turned inward,

distant from the world around

focus heavily amongst the spiritual realm.

Balance not a strong suit

often confused

misunderstood

finding the "grey" area

not the issue at all ...

Quite contrary

that is indeed

residency

majorly.



Often voiced;

old soul, wrong place in time,

hard to relate.

Stemming way back,

spiritual side preference

as opposed to this earthly nonsense.


One who comforts immensely knowing--
"Thy kingdom come, Your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven"



As this Lenten season progresses

continue observing

taken up;

wake-up,

did deep wilderness walking

calling ...

Mindful after three days

Christ risen from the dead

walked among the living again--

Still teaching.

Working.

Walking.

Via our

hearts, hands and feet...

City Break

Quiet, clear, coffee, moon and stars
Trickling water in the background
Engaging thoughts of pure wholeness
Every fiber of being
Taken in
Listening ...

The Forty Years

Recall as a small child thinking life was one big board game.
Everyone and everything in the world strategically placed
against me ...

Recall as well, many questions about God, Heaven, Death and Spirits.
Even though a small child, I felt I got the just of it
found it comforting and okay
even though some things explained were a little creepy.

Go ahead say I'm just a cub, still wet behind the ears,
what could I possibly know about life in Forty and a half years ...

Well, my friends, in the dozen or more should've been deads,
how the hell did I walk away from thats,
suicide attempts,
what did I do to deserve this
skin of my teeth
to safety's

during most of which faith pushed to broken
flipped God off and cursed His name
to the point of saying in vain is quite an understatement ...

Wasn't until twenty-nine and a half I heard it loud and clear;
I left you?

Go ahead "vet me" I tell you true;

He had enough, my not picking up what He's putting down
even during the bullshit.

Took me out,
could barely stand,
unsure of my own name, for almost 14 days.
Going from 2003 to 2013 in my mind, unsure which was which ...

In time out now, knowing fully time is running out,
I have been given a decade to decide ...
Live or Die!

Moral of the story;

I turned forty last August.
Fifty pounds lighter.
Eating healthy and exercising.
Not a drop to drink since 08-31-13.
More stable and mentally sound than I HAVE EVER BEEN.
Happy, whole and ME

All because God
NEVER LEFT ME ...
Ever,
for I truly am His!!!

Still Breath

Who knows the
Who
What
When
Where
Why
and how?
Only God does.

There are
Ups
Downs
Good days
Bad days
In betweens
Still breath in all of it
even at times when pain supersedes.

Through the thick and thin
it is He I call on for grace and strength through all of it.

Close knit circle of friends
in addition
for I am richly blessed and full...

Thanks be to God for the gift of all...